It turns out, it's okay

Recently, a aunt in Guangxi unintentionally seated the niece's cake, and the niece cried. Then, the whole family came around and scolded her aunt ...

In the news comment area of ​​the news, many people expressed "suffocation". Everyone thought of another case that recently attracted attention: a blogger shared that he met a family out of the airport at the airport. One of the children's documents expired, and the mother did not have He boarded and accompanied the child home, but because all the luggage of the family was hung in the mother's name, it could only be returned, which is equivalent to other family members only embarked on the journey with ID cards. But unexpectedly, no one was angry and accused, and the atmosphere was very relaxed throughout the process.

Therefore, "Character" launched a solicitation to readers: Is there any moment that you realized that it doesn't matter?

We received more than 300 letters. Everyone talked about those moments of being "held". I thought that things would be embarrassing and embarrassed. We were anxious and paniced for this, but the predicted complaints and accusations did not happen. The ground, even laughed and said, "It's okay!"

A new discovery is that in these more than 300 letters, dozens of similar stories come from girls. These girls have been required to be proper, regular, and obeying order. Once they do the wrong thing, even if they just overturn their bowls and buy the wrong ticket, they will face accusations, lessons, and even slap in the face. The long-term training made them difficult to "relax" in the future, and often fell into the vortex of "error-worry about accusation-panic blame".

Later, when I met such a moment again, someone suddenly told her: "It's okay, you are not intentional." Sometimes from friends and colleagues, more from their partners, so they get warm and cured in the new relationship. Essence The girls lamented the warmth and tolerance of their partners, but they rarely mentioned it. As one of the bosses who believed in, "the society encouraged boys to dare to try, and ask girls to be cautious and think twice. "

Another discovery is that many people talk about small things many years ago. For a long time to a few years, more than ten years ago, things are too small such as sprinkled disinfection water on the floor and the joy of losing roommates, but these old age The old things are still treasured by everyone, and they are seriously told, just because the tolerance I got at the time gave myself a lot of strength.

We also found that this relaxation will be "infectious". The person who is understood and accepted will also become relaxed and calm, and then try to understand and accept others, so that this power flows.

In short, after the bowl is broken, he packed up. After walking the wrong way, you can look at the scenery by the way. When the rain is wet, drink hot water and laughs. It's not a big deal.

Text ｜ Wang Shuangxing

Edit ｜ Chu Ming

"Go, Dad invite you to eat ice cream"

Faced with a bunch of messy stalls, he turned to find that the people around him not only had no anger and blame, but laughed at it, and things were too much.

@DD 20 years old

The driving license was taken, and the Second Section had been hung many times, and then went to the exam again. My father said: How good, you can have a coach to accompany you to practice your car.

@26 years old

In our New Year's Eve dinner, my grandma had just stewed pork ribs, and I brought me to the table from the yard to the table. As a result, I was tripped by the curtain as soon as I entered the door. A plate of pork ribs on my hand, except for the plate, lying on the ground, the soup was mixed with the soup, mixed with the soup, mixed with the soup. The white floor brick is very fierce. "Hahahahahahahaha." Grandpa, grandma, parents were laughing, without blame, no screams, just like I just did something to tease them. Grandma packed the ribs and cooked it in the pot. Nothing is not a big deal. If you have problems, you can find a way to solve it together. The family is the happiest thing together.

@23 years old

In the sophomore, four people went to Changbai Mountain to travel. This is our first collective trip. Everyone is very excited. We rushed to the station before the ticket checking the ticket with a bag. Everyone can have a smooth one. When we were happy, we found that we couldn't enter the station, and the roommate responsible for buying the tickets bought the wrong ticket. For a while, we panicked. In the same way, everyone did not complain about the roommate who bought the wrong ticket, but went to check the car and choose a new route. After re -planning the route, we set off again. Although everyone stood in the car, we didn't feel tired at all. I have graduated for a year in a blink of an eye, and they have separated from their roommates. If we can, the world is so big, let's take a look together.

@18 years old

At the end of last year, I bought the tickets that I wanted to watch two months in advance. When I grew up in South China, I grew up in South China. I saw Luo Xue for the first time. I had forgotten to play with my friends in the snow. I hurried to the bus to watch the drama in the afternoon. The reserved time was sufficient, but because the traffic was blocked on the snowy day, I was still in the car. I didn't panic at all. I took out my mobile phone to watch the previous video of this drama. At the moment of the drama, I started watching the video simultaneously. At the same time as the drama actors, I felt the rhythm of each character in the misplaced time and space on the bus. After half an hour, I arrived at the theater. I turned off my phone and seamlessly connected with live performances. The drama seemed to appear in front of the screen, but the characters looked more fresh and three -dimensional. It was originally a tragic experience that was late, because the relaxation became a special experience. @22 years old

Once the volunteer outdoor group construction was carried out, one of which was climbing mountain climbing. Considering that there were individual older elderly volunteers, let me take them another relatively gentle way. Although I stepped on the point one day in advance, the sense of direction was too bad, and the road was wrong. I walked a lot, and some of the mountain climbing even reached the summit. We are still looking for the road. I am anxious and guilty. At this time, one of the grandpa said, "It doesn't matter, you show us a different scenery that is different from others." They did not blame me and comforted me. Finally, I sang songs with them and re -reached the summit.

@存 47 years old

Go to the grassland of Hulunbuir in the summer and walk on the road of wooden boards in the middle of the grassland. The child's mobile phone accidentally falls into the gap between the wooden board. The wooden board cannot be disassembled. During the epidemic, there is no mobile phone. It can be said that it is difficult to walk. When I was at a loss, I suddenly found that there was a long clip with a golf ball next to the golf playground. I could explore it from the side of the wooden board. After trying it N times, the mobile phone was firmly clamped. Essence Afterwards, I patted my child's shoulder and told him that don't be afraid of things. Remember the lesson: Don't look at your mobile phone when walking, you must calm down when you go. Go, Dad invite you to eat ice cream. The child said, I want to drink watermelon juice.

@小 3 43 years old

When I was a kid, a winter night, my cousin and my cousin danced the bed where Grandpa slept. We stayed there at once. Grandma was beside him, and he stunned. The three lunatics instructed us to restore the bed, so let us go back to the big bed to sleep. The unknown grandfather fell asleep until the bed collapsed. We laughed and said that Grandpa slept the bed. Grandpa began to believe it, and then slowly reacted to say that it must be our three lunatic. Everyone laughed even more. Grandma is gone today. When we go home for the New Year, we will always talk about these grandma's house when we are young. Laughing together, and then suddenly silent, deep inside full of tenderness.

Picture Yuan "Thief Family"

Those moments of being held

It doesn't matter if there is a different sex orientation that is different from the majority of people; it doesn't matter if you can't get a graduate student; it doesn't matter if you can't find the future, it doesn't matter ... Those moments, someone reached out to hold you and tells you: it doesn't matter.

@Yao 29 years old

When I just graduated, I made a big mistake, changed the production documents parameters wrong, and made a large number of waste products. They were criticized by the quality department and the production department. This makes me more tolerant, stronger in my heart, and more careful work.

@24 years old

At the age of 18, he embarked on the road to studying abroad. He was looking forward to the inferiority of the inferiority brought by language and cultural differences before he started. During the day, I dare not approach the laughter and laughter. My parents went to school after sending me to school. I collapsed, but because I felt shameful, I dared not tell them at first. But after a few nights of insomnia, I couldn't help it. At 5 am, I called my mother and turned on. When I heard that I cried and cried, my parents did not ask or blame. Instead, they rushed back to the school and insisted that they would take me to other places for two days. In those two days, there was no question, they just accompanied me to see the sea and basking in the sun in the grass. In those two days, I fell asleep with a miraculous pillow, and I also had the courage to return to school. Parents' speechless love and companionship are universal medicine.

@Bench Errr 20 years old

Faced with the first choice after entering the university, the dual -minor literature was swaying in front of the economy or the economy. In fact, the wind in the heart is blowing to literature, but it is particularly afraid that turning hobbies into professionalism will disappoint and regret itself. Talking to a teacher I admired very much about her thoughts. After listening, she returned to me and said, "Since you want to learn literature now, then do it, at least for yourself at this moment. After you can try it, you can find that it is not suitable or disliked. This is nothing. "From a young age, big people said that the road you chose and crying, but this is the first time someone told me that if you don’t like it, if you don’t like it Then go another way. This sentence gave me at that time, so that I had more courage to do what I wanted to do.

@名 24 years old

I don't remember what happened that day, I just remember that I seemed to be incontinence in the classroom seat for a long time. How strong is the shame of this matter? I now write these words a little embarrassed, and I can only use incontinence to describe it at most. I only knew this at the same table. I forgot whether he or I knocked a glass of water or covered the trace. At the end of the get out of class, he handed me a shirt to hang up in his waist to cover up. After that, we never mentioned that, as if it never existed. Because of his help, this incident did not leave me any shadows and influences. This is undoubtedly a girl who wants to go to the toilet to go to the toilet. That seems to be the first time I was in a boy. Although I have never contacted in elementary school, he is very gentle and simple in my memory. I still remember his name, a few elementary school classmates who could remember the name. His handling of this matter also made me learn a kind of gentleness and kindness that was silent. Picture source "New Life of 新"

@22 years old

I confessed to my brother that I was gay. My brother was shocked first, and then never spoke. I received a WeChat in the early morning of the same day. He said that he had checked the information. This was not a disease. Let me accept himself. You can tell him everything in the future. At that time, I felt that I was never alone. I could really be accepted, and everyone could be accepted.

@Adele 23 years old

Once I met strange netizens. At that time, I was just an adult. In addition, the family relationship was fragmented, and my heart was very confused and helpless. I always felt that I was lacking in love. During the separation, although the other party did not show any reliable qualities throughout the process, he still asked the other party to "Can you hold me." As a result, the other party thought it was a signal of "seeking love". After hugging, he started to make manual feet, and then asked "should you go home with me?" Although I feel faintly deep in my heart, what will happen next, but the courage of "newborn calves is not afraid of tigers" has always been the idea of ​​"no place to go anyway", and the idea of ​​"there is no place to go" prompted me to nod. I spent their first sexual life with strangers in a dazed state. It was not only full of deep regrets for the first time I ended up, but also because the stranger's follow -up series of ignorance and mockery attitude. I started to doubt whether I was "Cheap Girl" in the traditional secular eyes.

No matter how big the heart is, it will be unbearable, so pretending to be disdainful with his mother confessed to this matter. Maybe at the time, the inner preset or even hidden expectation was to condemn me so that I would have the opportunity to refute me to refute me is you. I won't blame it so much. But what I didn't expect was that my mother didn't condemn me, but asked me in the first sentence: "Is there safety measures?" After getting a certain answer, the mother lamented: "You are really open now." But except for except for you Outside of these words, she didn't say anything. There is no unexpected condemnation and anger, only care of my own. Since then, my mother and I have become closer and closer. This error has made me uncomfortable for many years, but whenever I think of my mother's reaction, I think of the feeling at the time: the original virginity is really nothing. I just need to ensure my own health and safety. After all, I need to be responsible for my choice, not for the judgment of others.

@Chestnut 22 years old

In an internship in the law firm, you must continue to explain to you why "last year's single -line exams, and the postgraduate entrance examination has not been passed." I worked hard to explain that this year's people and business were really rolled up to many people's surprise. This year, the score line has risen by 40 points. I kept saying that I worked hard. But their expressions are still saying, "You can't pass the school." After many repetitions, my sister sitting next to me also repeated my experience. However, the sister did not show a little bit of "you have chosen the wrong" or "you must not learn seriously", and you don't need to explain all kinds of them again, but it is natural to say that this year's law test. I felt that I was embraced by that comfortable sense. For a long time, the default degree discrimination of the law of law in the law, disappearing in this "hug". Later, I learned that my sister had the same experience as me. She told me that she also felt that the sky was falling, but now it seems that there is nothing.

Picture source "Please answer 1988"

It's okay, girls have to go freely

"Men are always allowed until the boundary; women are always asking if they are allowed, and there are boundaries everywhere."

@小 2 28 years old

This year is losing weight, recurrence of eating disorders, daily appetite and weight, BMI is close to 15 is still not satisfied with yourself. One night at the end of May, because I was so hungry, I dared not eat and was afraid of fat. I lay on the floor at home and felt like a waste and monster. Satisfaction, even the figure is not well controlled, habitually blame and hate yourself, and at the same time feel self -pity and grievances. My sister sent me a long message. There is a saying in it that your skeleton is bigger, which makes your facial features more three -dimensional and better, but also determines that you can’t lose weight to those women who are 80 pounds online on the Internet. As a child, this is genetic, not your fault.

The education I received from childhood was very harsh. My parents kept telling me that if I did not do one thing, it must be my fault. I did not work hard. I did n’t get well because I did n’t work hard. I encountered campus violence on campus. Also find your own reason. But my sister told me for the first time that some things could not be as expected, not my fault, don't blame yourself, it doesn't matter. She has been telling me whether I will get better, whether I am skinny or becoming a big fat man, she loves me. @23 years old

I went to the Three Gorges Dam with my boyfriend's parents for nearly two hours. When I was about to arrive, I found that there was no taxi certificate. The boyfriend's dad came back from the place where the pass was applying for a pass. He could not take the driving permit to the Three Gorges Dam and could only change to another scenic spot. The boyfriend turned around. His mother sat in the back seat and asked me if I wanted to eat the Oreo biscuits of yogurt. No one complained or blamed. I grew up in a single -parent family. In the past, my parents would make a lot of noise in public and blame each other in public. When I was a kid, I was embarrassed and scared in the face of this situation. When I knew that the moment I didn't bring a driving certificate, I was sitting in a very tense position in the co -driver. The uncomfortable mood when I was a kid came. It was expected that everyone would be unhappy all day. As a result, nothing happened, and the four people went to another scenic spot together. At that moment, I felt long -sighted, and the fearful child in his heart was comforted.

@Snow 25 years old

I went out for the first time with my boyfriend. I have worked hard since I had n’t washed my clothes since I was a child (at the same time to show virtuous) to help him wash the warm underwear, because I am afraid that I do n’t dry up and I want to blow it with a hair dryer. After burning the hole, a good clothes were scrapped. Knowing that he didn't bring other clothes and was afraid of cold, I thought he would be angry, or at least blame me why I thought of blowing clothes with a hair dryer, and at the same time, I was frustrated because of my incompetence. I showed him the clothes uneasily. He looked incredible and silent for more than ten seconds. I felt that my heart was pounding. I was really sorry. I was so stupid. Get up, the more you laugh, the happier. He said: Hahahaha, how did you think of blowing dry clothes with a hair dryer, you are so cute. This made me stunned, and at the same time, my self -blame and embarrassment swept away, and then laughed.

From a young age to break things, I will be severely accused by my parents, saying that I don't love things, and may even be weird at home at home. This is the first time that others have used "cute" to describe my mistake. I found that I was a person who did not allow myself to make mistakes since I was a child. Whether I booked the wrong ticket, I did the wrong question or said something wrong. The inner strict voice would continue to attack me. It wasn't until this incident that another sound appeared in my heart for the first time: hahahaha, you are so cute. So I told myself, yes, but it ’s just a mistake. The mistakes can be very cute. Why are you so serious? This year is the sixth year we are together. I feel that I am getting cute.

@小 小 34 years old

When I joined the job five years ago, I introduced myself at the team's big conference for the first time. I was a little nervous and not very good. I made up a sentence on the spot: "Sometimes I am timid and introverted. I hope everyone can forgive me. I will be in the future. Improve in work. "The boss (female) took me." This is not your problem. This is a social problem. It encourages boys to dare to try it. It also requires girls to be cautious and think twice. It doesn't matter, you are great and smart, just be yourself. "At that time, I was stunned. From childhood to small, the introverted was always the disadvantage of being referred to by others. Parents always said that they should be brave. No one has always told me, "It's okay, you are also good, this is not your problem, don't worry about it." This really encouraged me, and then gradually understood that men were always allowed until they touched it until they touched it until they touched it. To the boundary, women are always asking whether they are allowed, and there are boundary everywhere. I later intended to break this constraint at work and become more confident. Thanks to her understanding and guidance in that moment, so that the introvert is no longer my burden.

Picture source "Sudden Holiday"

"I hope that every step can go generous"

Either a sense of relaxation or a calm mentality. Such traits and atmosphere are flowing. It infects others in virtue and pass "it doesn't matter".

@岁 27 years old

When I was six or seven years old, one day when my mother swept the floor, I accidentally broke my dad's large altar medicinal wine. I think my father will be angry, sad, and blame his mother when he goes home. Dad went home at night, he didn't feel bad about wine, nor had his temper, everything was as usual, and the atmosphere was good. It turns out that it is not blamed for making mistakes. If you have love, you can be tolerant and considerate. This made me start to believe in the power of love, dare to do things bolder, and to be more tolerant and love when getting along with the other half. Now that the children are just full, I hope he can feel the power of love in the future.

@岁 5 25 years old

One morning in the senior year, because it was too early, it was dark, and there was still a little mist in winter. I rushed from home to school with a battery car. When I got up, I thought that I would be reprimanded by the bicycle again. As a result, the classmate helped her car, came to pull me again, and asked nervously, are you okay? This person who is tolerant and kind to me lets me remember now (about three). This makes me a man who is impatient and bad. When I meet something, no matter what the other person is for the reason, I can find a reason to let myself calm down. @蛋 29 years old

Human cubs fell to the ground because of my mistake. My husband was sleeping at that time, and was scared by the loud noise and the sharp cry of the cub. Both of us were stunned for a second. The lamp, then got up and turned on the light. We first confirmed that the cub was crying without coma and then hugged it carefully. I coaxed him. My husband took out his mobile phone to check what to do. Then he went to the freezer to pick up the ice bag. He coaxed to sleep, and my husband did not blame me and I was not angry. We analyzed what should be done afterwards, and at the same time we learned the strategies of various accidents. If my husband usually makes mistakes, as long as it is not principled or caused very serious consequences, I will not be angry. We will find a way to make up for and solve the problems that occur together.

@43 years old

A grandma on the roadside was carrying a little girl with a little girl. Grandma looked sixty or seventy years old. The little girl was about four or five years old. Both of them were thin. When the grandma walked through a small slope, he suddenly poured backwards. After falling, Grandma was sitting on the ground. I passed by next to me, and my heart tightened, thinking that the little girl would cry, and my grandma nervously watched her break. As a result, my grandmother sat on the ground, turned to see the little girl, and then laughed. The little girl started to laugh at her grandma. The two laughed for a while, stood up, patted the soil on their bodies, and pulled hands to continue. This reminds me of my uncle. When I was a kid, I often took me out to play. No matter what happened, it didn't seem to be nervous, anxious, always calm, calm, and happy. Later, my mother took me to her. She was very tight, and everything was required to be perfect. I also felt depressed and fearful. When I grow up, in the face of the problem, I sometimes have the lightness and relaxation of the clouds, and sometimes there will be a mother's anxiety and nervousness, and it is repeated in these two states.

@岁 36 years old

The baby broke the coffee table, and the glass fragments splashed everywhere. At the age of 4, he was in place. He didn't know what to do. Her husband was anxious and ready to scold him. I opened my husband and asked him to help me get a broom, be careful to check that the baby was not splashed by the glass, took him to the door of the bedroom, chatted and comforted him while cleaning up, and asked him to check if there was no corner of the corner. My husband and I have no so -called relaxation since I was a child. As long as I have made mistakes at home, I will be scolded by a meal. The people's teachers of my husband's family will be cited by the classic education. When I was a kid, I had a little thing because I was hiding outside and dared not go home. There will be a lot of challenges and forks in the future of the baby. We hope that no matter what he makes mistakes, we don't need to conceal it to us, and every step can be generous.

The source "We are composed of miracles"

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