The more noisy, the sweeter?How to cure the conflict in love cleverly, you need to master 2 CBT treatment tips

Author:Simple psychology Time:2022.08.03

In "The Art of Love", From said, "Love is a positive ability, it is to pay, care and respect; it is a technology that needs to be continuously learned and practiced; , Reasonable and creative problem solving. "

We are all eager to have a happy relationship and can gain full love, but this does not seem to be an easy task.

The simple psychological release of the "2021-2022 Volkswagen Psychological Health Insight Report" shows that for the public, the issue of intimacy and marriage and family is still one of the main psychological distortion of the public. Among them, the troubles brought about by partner communication and conflict are the most prominent.

In the first quarter of 2022 issued by the Ministry of Civil Affairs, the social service statistics of the provinces in the first quarter of 2022, a total of 2.107 million newcomers registered for marriage in the first quarter of the 22nd year, a year -on -year decrease of 1.17%. In contrast, there were 514,000 couples divorced, A year -on -year increase of 73.6%.

We always try to avoid conflicts and disputes in intimate relationships, but it seems that avoiding or explosion cannot solve the problem.

It is difficult to love each other, and it is more difficult to get along. When more and more people find the consultant because of the intimate relationship, how to understand this problem? Is there a way to solve these problems efficiently? Can this method be effective for a long time?

You can find the answer you want in cognitive behavior therapy (CBT).

01

Conflict on partner conflicts under CBT treatment

From the perspective of CBT, any conflict can be explained by thinking.

For example, the partner of the Qixi Festival forgot to give you gifts, what is your first idea?

It may be that "such an important day is forgotten, it can be seen that it is not loved"; maybe "such an important day, TA forgotten, is TA too busy recently?"

The emotions caused by the two ideas are different, and the results of the behavior are completely different. The first one may be a big quarrel, and the second may be expressing comfort.

This process is the most basic chain model in the CBT treatment process model.

Of course, in actual life, most of the acts of acts are not single lines, especially in intimate relationships.

Still the above example. If your last behavior is to find a partner and quarrel, and the quarrel will become a new situation that causes TA ideas. This idea will lead to new emotions and new behaviors. The ultimate action will be on you. Cycling has become your new situation.

Does it look like a Mobius infinite loop?

The key to breaking this infinite loop is your idea cognition, that is, "C" in CBT.

The founders of CBT, Aaron Beck, Albert Ellis, and Donald Meichenbaum, although the theoretical technologies focusing differently, they all emphasized recognition Knowing the importance.

Among them, Dr. Melken Bum advocated cognitive behavior therapy with a constructive narrative perspective, observed the visitor to tell his stories, and considering that the visitors developed differently and more positive stories. Cognitive behavior therapy.

详 Code code to understand the course details

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