Bringing a baby according to the law, this is a must -have course for a family

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The "Family Education Promotion Law of the People's Republic of China" (hereinafter referred to as the "Family Education Promotion Law") will be implemented on January 1, 2022. This is my country's first special legislation on family education. It is also the protection of the rule of law that promotes the healthy growth and comprehensive development of minors.

Since the promulgation of the "Family Education Promotion Law", the Municipal Women's Federation and the Municipal Education Bureau have led the implementation department to incorporate family education guidance services into the urban and rural public service system, and promote the continuous improvement of family education guidance services.

A few days ago, the reporter interviewed relevant educational experts and some parents in our city to conduct in -depth exchanges and dialogues on how to do family education and become qualified parents in accordance with the law.

9 most important family education concept

1

Parents are family education

First responsible person

2

Reject any form

domestic violence

3

Respect and protect

Children's personality dignity

4

The right to choose to choose

5

Psychological support

More important than material support

6

Only

Children's fate

7

Be good at discovering

Advantage of children

8

Words and tutoring

Teacher the son also teach yourself

9

Don't let your children do it for you

achive dreams

｜ Dalian News Media Group reporter Qu Qi ｜

Parental story

Psychological support

More important than material support

In the junior high school graduation season, the children were young at the campus of the 34th Middle School in Dalian.

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According to a survey by the China Youth Daily through the "Questionnaire Network", a survey of 1,149 minors' parents showed that 80.7%of the parents interviewed were confused a lot in family education. In the interview, many people in the educational community also expressed a common voice: "Family Education Promotion Law" called parents to pay attention to their children's spiritual growth.

Ms. Li's children have been "tipped" all the way from childhood to large grades. They are admitted to Nankai University from the 24th Middle School of Dalian City. Ms. Li said that they had faced naughty children at the elementary school and were at a loss. They also had a cow with their children in high school and were difficult to communicate. "If you sum up your experience, it is not to force your child to become what we want, nor can it be required to obey blindly and be a communication parent and parent."

Ms. Li's son has been smart and clever since she was a child. "I was particularly angry at the time. The school's weekly evaluation of the excellent classes was always selected because my children made mistakes. I was so embarrassed that I went home to copy the children, but it was basically useless." Ms. Li said that at that time The most correct thing is to communicate in time with the teacher, and he is embarrassed to contact the teacher because the child always makes mistakes. Teacher teacher told her that the child's strength is concentration and high learning efficiency. Do not destroy this concentration. Ms. Li kept this in mind that she never interrupted her children whether she was playing with toys or learning. "I don't hurry up after cooking. The child is not short of nutrition, and it is not bad for that hour. Give him a period of time to focus on what he wants to do."

What should I do if my child is energetic at school? Ms. Li and the teacher discussed whether they could disperse his attention. Therefore, the small test of the class was approved by the child every morning. It was quite fresh two days ago. Two days later, the child said that he would not criticize. "We have always been closely linked to the teacher, and the home -school cooperation is comprehensively cooperated. The teacher teaches because of the characteristics of the child. If the child learns in class, you can see other subjects. My younger brothers and sisters lectured, not only released their energy, but also exercised. "In this way, parents and schools did not deliberately correct the so -called" faults ". Children who were naughty all the way maintained abundant vitality and successfully admitted to key high schools.

Ms. Li said that after the child entered high school, the rebellion period also followed. He loved to play with mobile phones and watched anime. "As long as I mentioned it, he immediately wanted to sleep and said that it didn't matter which university he was admitted to." This made it made When Ms. Li was tangled with unprecedentedly, when the parent -child relationship was the most tense, the mother and child had a mouth when they met. "I was even so angry that I cried in the hospital corridor. Later, the teacher of the class teacher found me and suggested that I change my mentality and face the child's rebellious period correctly." At that year's parent meeting, Ms. Li spoke to the children on behalf of her parents. She said: "At the high school stage, your grades are not ideal, and your mother is anxious to help you analyze the reason. In the process, we have conflicts. You. Here I also want to say the voice of many parents. We are now in the stage of old and old, and the unhappiness in life and the discomfort in work will affect our emotions. I hope that children will lose their temper in our temper. When we can also understand that we are not perfect. As parents, we also need to learn and make progress a little. "

Ms. Li's rebellion period also ended with the end of the college entrance examination. At Nankai University, he was the chairman of the student union with excellent grades, and was later sent to Tsinghua University to study for graduate students. "For the first time as a parent, we are all exploring. From the perspective of the child's experience, I understand that facing a child with strong personality, we cannot change to change by the top of the conflict. Parents must also learn to follow. To communicate instead of allowing children to obey blindly. "Reading with your child every day can not only develop a good habit of reading children, improve parent -child relationship, but also the best relaxation for parents.

Ms. Li said that fortunately, she met an excellent teacher. When she and their children could not talk, the teacher played a bridge. "Establishing a teacher in the heart of the child from an early age. When the teacher and the students are contradictory, don't first question the teacher. Think about the problems of the child's body. Let the family and the school resonate with the same frequency. "

Teacher's point of view

Educate in accordance with the law

Scientific nurture

Teacher Zhao Minbo, No. 44 Middle School in Dalian City, has more than 20 years of first -line head teacher experience. He has won honorary titles such as "National Advanced Individual in Ecological Civilization Education" and "Outstanding Counselor of Liaoning Province". As a senior family education instructor, she listed many cases of family education in an interview with reporters. "The family is the first class of the child. The parents are the first teacher of the child. Respect and guidance are the only. Love, law, and responsibility are there. "Teacher Zhao Minbo said.

The following is the narration of Teacher Zhao Minbo:

Following the characteristics of family education, implementing scientific family education concepts and methods, equal communication, mutual respect, understanding and encouragement is an important method and strategy.

A morning reading online, the whole class opened the video, and I found a parent standing beside the child. I had suggested at the parent meeting before that the parents did not have to take care of the parents during class. Parents were tired, and the effect was not necessarily good. I just asked the parents to leave, but found that the parents suddenly kicked their children, and then the father and son were upgraded ... Later, they communicated with the parents to understand that the cause was very small: the child had a cold the day before, his father was distressed and angry, and complained about the child. It is caused by the long time of playing the previous day. Let the child take medicine, the child does not take it, and the father has upgraded the contradiction.

The third grade is the time when parents and children are easy to be anxious. On that day, I and their family of three communicated in detail. I told parents that adolescent children are desire to be independent and equal, and they need to be respected and effectively communicated. Parents must know that education should be taught with cameras, enlightened in daily life, and must be compassionate, care about love and strict requirements. After this small contradiction was resolved, the child came to me and said, "Teacher, I have something wrong, I have apologized to my father."

Children of adolescence have immature thoughts, unstable behavior, strong sense of independence, sensitive and curious. Once a parent left a message to me: "The child recently lost his temper with his parents and said that we have been forcing him to learn. If he did not give birth to him, he would not be as tired as he is now." The boy was more introverted and his grades were in the middle. After the tendency to learn from school, parents use adults' cognition and their children to talk about the truth, and their words are heavier, so the effect is very bad.

Exercise with your children and be a parent who can communicate.

The suggestion I gave to this parent is: "In the past parent -child communication, my mother had a place that was inaccurate to make the child very reverse. When parents, they would also learn to apologize to their children, and then hug him, touch her head, and touch her head. Give love and encouragement. "After several family education guidance, the parents told me to apologize to my child, and the child cried, saying that he was under pressure and was boring in his heart.

In family education, parents need to respect the laws and minds and individual differences of minors, and take flexible and diverse measures in accordance with the actual situation.

When you see that your child is not studying well or playing games, the first reaction of many parents is to jump like a thunder, which will trigger a sense of evasion, let the child reverse, and at the same time stimulate the fear of emotions, because the emotions are memory, but it will cause the child to be tired of the child. study. You must know that in your child's heart, the attractiveness of playing games and doing homework is completely different. The attraction of children to be attracted by games is a normal reaction. Parents should try to avoid using playing, scolding, and roaring.

However, it is not possible to fully cultivate the Buddha, holding the views of "good or bad performance", "all natural", "all the children and grandchildren have children and grandchildren". The main task of children at the stage of primary and secondary schools is to learn. If the learning is not good, it may become insufficient confidence and self -evaluation. Children will reduce the successful experience in the learning process and gradually lose their confidence.

Parents are the first responsible person of family education and guide parents to grow with their children.

Parents are a difficult and complicated job. These methods should be avoided as much as possible: staring too tightly or too high goals, and nagging; these words should be said less: "Don't rub" "Why is it wrong again."

Follow the characteristics of family education, establish a scientific and correct family education concept and method, subtly involve, and combine the words and education to grow with children.

I often ask my parents to ask me, what should I do if my child is nervous and unsatisfactory? I suggest that effective encouragement should be focused on specific behaviors. Don't take your own child to compare directly to others. Don't say that a classmate is really good to learn, but which specific behavior and aspect of a classmate is worth learning. For example, the classmate A's wrong question book is very standardized. affim. Effective encouragement needs to focus on specific behaviors, strengthen the inherent benefits of behavior, and let children imitate excellence instead of pointing to the result. Progress a little every day, and the quality can be changed from quantitative change. When specific behavior rises to quality, it can move to the future situation. Adolescent children dislike their parents praise others and are unwilling to accept criticism. Therefore, parents should not always emphasize how hard they are. When they are young, they are not good. At this time, it is necessary to pay attention and praise the child's behavior, so that the child feels that every step forward has a sense of achievement.

Seeing long -term, let go of anxiety. There are three tricks to share with parents: to see the "difficulties" of the child and provide support; to understand the repeated and recovering methods in the process of progress; when the child's heart has long -term goals, you can let go of anxiety to form a wise education method.

Family education in the new era calls for parents' self -learning and improvement. You don't have to understand pretending, let alone blame your children because they do not understand or do not figure out the problem. The best way is to learn with children, be a role model for children, educate according to law, and raise scientifically.

School experience

Created together by home and school

Better growth environment

In recent years, Zhongshan District Minsheng Primary School has carried out a lot of active exploration and practice in the education of people at home, especially in improving parents' concepts of educating people, and guiding parents to attach importance to family education. It has achieved certain results.

Students from Minsheng Primary School in Zhongshan District learn to cook under the guidance of their parents.

"We conduct a parent questionnaire survey at least once a year. First, we preliminary understanding of the basic situation of first -year freshmen, the students' learning environment, and the confusion of parents during the process of childhood connection. Parents' new needs; Third, some are targeted to provide parents with effective family education strategies. "Leng Gongcheng, president of Minsheng Primary School in Zhongshan District.

Starting from the needs of students, the school organizes parents to carry out the case of family education cases, selects "good parents of people's livelihood", commended the whole school on the "Children's Day" Children's Day, and shared the experience of these "good parents" to play a demonstration radiation role.

Family home visits are the home -school communication strategies that Minsheng Elementary School has adhered to for many years. "We have always adhered to the student's family, experienced the children's learning environment, and understood the status of family education. During the epidemic, more mobile phone visits were used to use telephones, nailing and other methods, but it still needs to focus on the situation when ensuring safety. The student's home. "Leng Gongcheng said. In the family visits, they adopted the "One Two Three Fourth Four" model, one is to understand the children's family and the performance of the home; the other is to communicate with the parents with the effective way to communicate and educate the children; Support and psychological assistance; fourth is the mutual feedback of the respective situation of schools, parents, children, and teachers.

There was once a student's unsatisfactory performance and parents did not cooperate. Teacher Li Li and his mother talked several times. The first sentence of Teacher Li's home visits was: "The child did not take the exam this time, the main reason lies in me, let him lose the points that should not be lost. I have confidence to help him put his grades, but I need your help How can we work together? "This communication attracted the attention of the child's mother. She began to fully cooperate with the teacher's work, change the learning attitude with the child, establish a learning habits, and improve the academic performance. The D level is improved to level B.

In 2021, the 8th Dalian Station of the National Family Fitness Challenge -Xigang District Zhaolin Elementary School Tournament is underway.

"The mission of education in the new era is not only imparting knowledge for students, but also to help more parents master the scientific family education methods, liberate family education from the vassal status of school education, and truly realize the cooperation of school education and family education. Children create a better growth space and environment. "Leng Gongcheng said.

(The picture of this draft is provided by the interviewed unit)

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