Lack of this feeling of feelings will seriously damage your health in the long run

Have you ever had the following experiences?

Feeling psychological injuries, the enthusiasm for life was gone, and lack of enthusiasm and motivation to work and live. Low down, lack of hope for the future, and gradually numb work. In a relationship, the other party treats themselves so that he feels unavoidable, and even has the psychology of resentment and revenge on the other party.

Injury, numbness, emptiness, and resentment, these emotions are related to an important experience in life. This experience is a sense of dignity as a person.

In our lives, "Dignity" is rarely discussed. What is a sense of dignity as a person? Why is it so important? How to maintain its existence? Continue to introduce the concept of dignity today.

What is dignity?

Dr. Donna Hicks is the head of the project of Harvard's international conflict analysis and solution. Essence She is also a psychologist.

Solving the dispute, she finally put her attention on the "dignity". She found that dignity had a profound impact on the level of the welfare of the individual. She wrote the book "Dignity" and created "Dignity Approach" to solve people's pain and problems.

She said that when people feel their dignity, they will have a healthy level of well -being so that they can grow and prosper. And when a relationship causes their dignity to be damaged -not only intimate relationships, friendship, affection, work relationships, relationships between people and organizations, and the relationship between people and society. Bring pain and suffering.

Psychologist Donna Hicks pointed out that "sense of dignity" is a very basic experience. When everyone is born, it has it. It is our basic right as a person -it means that everyone only needs to exist as existence It is valuable and should be treated as a person.

Donna Hicks said dignity is a complex concept and contains 10 components. If these 10 points are also available, then it means that your sense of dignity is well protected. What I want to remind everyone here is that real life will not be perfect. If you find that you lack in these 10 points, you don't have to worry. We introduce these 10 points just to let you know a better direction.

In different relationships, our sense of dignity is also different. You can distinguish between your life through these 10 points, bringing you a sense of dignity, and which aspects destroy your sense of dignity.

1. Acceptance of identity

Feeling your true self is allowed to be expressed. Regardless of race, religion, gender, class, sexual orientation, age, and disability, they are also accepted. They are not worried about being discriminated against and judged because of their identity.

2. Recognition

I feel that my talents, hard work, thinking, help, etc. are recognized, and their contributions, ideas, and experience have also been affirmed.

3. Beauty (ACKNOWLEDGMENT)

Listened and seen by lover or others, his pain was not despised, and his confusion was responded.

4. Inclusion

I am confident in family, communities, work institutions, and social environments.

5. sense of security

It feels safe and psychologically, and is not worried about being hurt or humiliated. When you have concerns, you can also say it completely without fear of being punished by any meaning.

6. Fairness

Equality and fairness treat others in accordance with the law and rules.

7. sense of independence

Feel that you have enough power to control your life, hope for the future, and believe in the possibility of yourself and life.

8. The feeling of being understood

In the relationship, your thoughts and perspectives have the opportunity to explain to the other party. The other party believes that your thoughts are also important, and you will work hard to understand you.

9. Benefit of the Doubt

Even if there are doubts, when there is no evidence, it is trusted to assume that others have a good motivation.

10. Accountability

Like any right, rights are accompanied by responsibility. You have the ability to take responsibility for your own behavior. If you hurt others, you have the ability to admit, apologize, and change.

Life without dignity,

It is not possible to have well -being

So you see, dignity is a comprehensive emotion full of positive feelings. Every life is worth having such emotions.

The sense of dignity will make us feel that our lives are in the control of ourselves, and it is the choice of true self -autonomy. Therefore, we can love life, and we also love this kind of loyal to the true heart.

A person is in a life that does not meet the mainstream social standards -such as poverty or not infertile -maybe be sincere and happy? The answer is yes. If they feel their dignity in this life, they will be self -firm, peaceful, and happy. Studies have found that dignity therapy has an excellent rehabilitation effect on patients with depression, because dignity therapy can evoke the pride of patients with depression, and because of the pride of their own life, to produce confidence in controlling life, and hope for life (Vaghee & Heydari, 2016).

Studies have also found that with the maturity and development of people, when the TAs have formed a understanding of their integrity, and their sense of dignity of the overall self, the TAs will also show a higher motivation to carry out those pro -society of those pro -society The activity of his person (Sheldon & Kasser, 2001). More importantly, the satisfaction of the TAs will also become higher (McADAMS ET Al., 1993).

And when we lose dignity, we will:

Allow us to be humiliated and stop loving ourselves full of sadness and fear. I feel that life is not in the control of ourselves. I feel that we lack power and become numb and obedient. It is mentioned that people who feel damaged dignity will also hurt the dignity of others)

In contrast to the 10 constituent factors of dignity mentioned earlier, and the performance of losing dignity. Do you think you live a dignified life in your current life?

Dignificance comes to everyone,

However, it needs to be repeatedly verified and perceived in the relationship

Psychologist Donna Hicks said that the sense of dignity plays a vital role in solving the conflict in the relationship and the establishment of a good relationship.

This is because when one party feels the harm of dignity by the other party, it will cause disgust, hatred, and revenge. Donna Hicks repeatedly emphasized that psychological injuries and physiological injuries will respond in the same area of ​​the brain, that is, psychological injuries are as serious as physiological injuries.

Even more serious, "in real life, some people even pay their lives to maintain their dignity." Donna said.

In the relationship, what kind of treatment we get to feel whether our dignity exists and is damaged. The relationship here refers not only between people, but also people, people and communities, people, people, and society.

Several things in the relationship will seriously damage our sense of dignity:

1. humiliation (humiliation)

The behavior of infringing our sense of dignity can be felt by our intuition, even those humiliated behaviors that are delicate and seemingly unable to find evidence. These humiliated behaviors forced us to "bow their heads", and they made us feel low -value and lost their sense of dignity. Humiliation does not necessarily come from the enemy, sometimes from the closest people or even parents.

2. Objectification (Objectification), Instrumentalization, and Dehumanization

Some behaviors treat people as a tool to satisfy their goals: such as tools that function into sexual tools, take care of family or emotional companionships; there are also some men's tools to "buy orders". There are also some behaviors that regard others as "lower than" their own existence. As the object of these behaviors, it will cause dignity damage.

I am regarded as a local and one -sided function of myself, becoming a tool to meet the needs -it is a very dignified experience.

In the work scenario, if you are used as a screw, you ca n’t feel the feelings of human beings. For example, female workers on the assembly line will also feel the loss of dignity because of de -humanization.

It is worth noting that self -tool/de -humanization can also cause dignity damage. Those behaviors that are brainwashed by money supremacy, regarding themselves as things, pricing themselves, and selling prices in the marriage/money trading market are also hurting their dignity.

3. Do not hear or see, let us feel very small.

In some relationships, one party has made every effort to hope that the other party will see and hear their thoughts, feelings, needs, and preferences, and the other party will not respond and will destroy the sense of dignity. Of course, this feeling will not only happen in interpersonal.

In addition, there are 4. Rejection and not accepted; 5. Security is threatened (such as diseases can make people lose dignity); 6. Discovery; and 7. No chance to choose.

There are many possible situations that are not given to the opportunity to choose. Sometimes it is due to doting and protection, but ignoring this is a negation of our strength. Sometimes it is insufficient for poverty or other types of resources. Sometimes for political reasons.

Whatever the reason, which hinders us to become the subject of our own destiny, it will destroy our sense of dignity.

*It is worth mentioning that the expression of dignity in life is not "proud".

People with a sense of dignity can only maintain humility in interpersonal, treat others seriously, and respect others. People with dignity can deeply understand that their own value is inherent. Because TAs have such deep respect for themselves, TAs can also understand the value of others as my person. We can easily distinguish between those "dignified people" and "self -centered, self -big people" in the crowd. The former is gentle and firm, and in the face of others, they are always decent and sincere. The latter mistakenly believes that his sense of dignity is very high. In fact, he never considers the value of others and what kind of respect for others, and does not know how to really respect yourself.

Dignity is important to individuals and is also important to society. What connects individuals together is the common needs of people, the need for being seen, heard, treated fairly, and understood by everyone. It is the need for everyone to feel safe. A dignified society, the relationship between people will be very harmonious.

(Related reading: The deepest relationship between two people is not "I love you", but "I saw you")

I feel the sense of dignity is destroyed,

What should I do?

Because dignity is so important, no matter what kind of relationship, we should be aware of the damage of dignity.

Maybe sometimes we have to compromise with part of the dignity to maintain survival -for example, a little bit of intimacy has made our dignity lose, but for the time being, we still do not have the power of departure -at least we must know that we have paid very valuables very valuablely Things, and consciously work hard to repair their sense of injuries.

Studies have found that when we talk about our past successful experiences, memories of the joy, and happy days, we can make us feel the sense of control of emotions and our ability to manage life. At the same time, these memories will also become a source of hope. In addition, we can repair the sense of dignity like this:

Through one aspect of life, or to find the value of self, such as a good friend, or you are good at doing some small things to find your own sense of power, recall your memory of the challenge, feel that you have the ability in the process that you have the ability to be capable of being capable The feeling and recognition of your friends talk, through their eyes, see the dignified narrative of life, find the hope of "even if there is a bad situation, life will continue" every day, and then complete some small tasks, and then complete the completion They, this will make you feel good about yourself through self -dialogue, often remind yourself that it is a valuable person, and you deserve to be respected

At the same time, treating others with dignity can also enhance our own sense of dignity.

Keep empathy with the life situation of others. If you can't do it, please keep respect and not evaluate. When others have a point of view, if you want to publish, listen to TA, encourage TA to explain to others' contributions to admit and affirm the rejection of others in the back, refuse to make fun Or humiliate the behavior of others, I believe the value of others, I believe that others deserve to be treated sincerely

May we always have a dignified life. above.

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