"Buy" can't afford her husband, they go to grab

Author:Look at the think tank Time:2022.08.31

There are tens of millions of ways to marry. Is "grabbing groom" the most outrageous?

India has a word called "PAKADWA VIVAH", which means "abduction for marriage", also known as "grabbing groom".

More than two months ago, Satyam Kumar JHA, a 26 -year -old veterinarian in Bighabon, India, encountered "PAKADWA VIVAH".

On that day, Satiam went out to the consultation after receiving the phone. However, he was tied to a marriage inexplicable. He had neither his parents nor a matchmaker. More importantly, there is no dowry.

In Bigharbon, "grabbing the groom" has become a phenomenon, and thousands of related cases occur every year. According to local police data, such cases ranged from 4,498 in 2019.

Wen | Liu Yang

This article is reproduced from the WeChat public account "South Wind Window" (ID: Southreviews). The original first was released on August 20, 2022. The original title was "Can't Find a Husband, they to grab", which does not represent the viewing think tank view.

Get married

On June 13, Satiam received a call and the other party asked him to go to the neighboring village to heal a sick cow.

For an ordinary veterinarian, this is a reasonable request. Satiam didn't think much, and left home at noon to go to the village next door. What was worried about his parents began to worry that Satiam did not return until late at night.

His parents were trying to call the police, and he received a wedding video on his mobile phone. The groom was Satiam -in the past few hours, his son had become the husband of others.

His parents realized that Satiam was abducted "forced marriage".

The abducted veterinarian Satiam

Parents are no stranger to this, because similar cases occur almost every year in the local area:

In March 2020, Amit Kumar, a student student, was abducted to Samastebul to marry a minor girl;

In June 2019, Nityanand Kumar Rai in Gaya District was abducted by six men on the way out and was forced to form a husband and wife with a minor female student.

The phenomenon of "abduction and marriage" is the most common in eastern northern states and its adjacent Biharbon. The official report revealed that thousands of related cases occur every year in the latter area.

In India, some families to be married will have better single men in order to avoid high dowry, and make them marry by kidnapping -also known as "grabbing grooms". Among them, middle -class men, government employees, doctors, businessmen, and company managers are the most popular objects.

In order to be easier to achieve, some families even directly focus on minors. According to the 2015 report of the National Criminal Survey Agency in India, the number of cases of Bo Halbon's abduction of boys ranked first in the country.

In fact, "grabbing the groom" is the "shortcut" that some families come up with their daughters. General women usually need to give men's dowry tens of thousands of rupees, but for the underworld gangs of professional "grabbing grooms", turning single Han into a "quasi -groom" only requires a gun.

A group of people poured Indian guys to the ground, forcing him to attend the prepared wedding

In 2018, Vinod Kumar, a 29 -year -old engineer at the Bokarar Steel Factory, suffered a kidnapping while attending the wedding in the Bartner area. Because he couldn't hold the threat of real guns, he married a woman.

After the incident, their wedding videos flowed out on the Internet. In the picture, the groom was crying, and the bride looked sad. In a "festive" and "lively" atmosphere, the two -person puppet puppets were governed by the woman's family to finish the wedding ceremony.

A relative of the woman even said to Vonor: "It's just letting you get married, not letting you die." But for Veno, who was forced to marry, this is a dual -choice question.

The forced marriage groom Vino Kumar cried and completed the wedding ceremony

The wedding scene is so unbearable, will the groom and the bride be happy after marriage?

Look at luck.

Manoj Shah is a lucky exception.

It has been more than 20 years since Mano was forced to marry Ganga Devi, Ganga Devi. "At the end of the wedding, I saw the bride's face, and I fell in love with her at that moment." Later, they gave birth to four children, and their eldest daughter had already married.

But in more cases, the forced marriage couples are sad and long for their lives.

One night in 2010, Randhir Kumar, a 18 -year -old Randhir Kumar in the Berktiabul area, was robbed on the way home and was taken directly to the temple to marry a girl who had never met. The woman's family threatened that if he dares to hurt or abandon the bride, the entire family of Randell will not guarantee his life.

Randell and his parents were not convinced. Later, under the intervention of the police, the kidnapping person was arrested and the marriage relationship between the two was canceled.

Randir finally got married as his beloved. Finally, the person who pays for this "farce" may become a bride himself.

Groom sale

"Robbing the groom" looks like a conspiracy of the woman's family, but in fact, its symptoms are the high dowry generally requested by the man.

Taking Bigharbon as an example, the local dowry amount is generally between 50 and 600,000 rupees (1 yuan is equal to 11.72 rupees), but Statista data shows that the per capita annual income of the state in 2020 is only 45,000 rupees. This dowry is likely to be a family deposit for many years.

About 10 million couples are married every year in India, and 95%of them give dowry. On average, the "starting price" of dowry is from 200 to 300,000 rupees, up to 20 to 30 million rupees. It is estimated that the total dowry in the year has reached at least 5 to 10 trillion rupees -even surpassed the country's budget in national defense, health and education.

India ’s annual defense budget and education budget are about 3.5 trillion rupees and 930 billion rupees, respectively. If you look at the following sets of data, a trace of irony can not be avoided: about 1,500 soldiers died each year in India, but women who were killed for dowry were five times the number.

India's investment in education is not low. But even so, the total educational level of Karara, the total dowry from 1960 to 2008 still turned three.

In the context of the dowry system, India even derived the "groom market".

In July, the summer heat was flourishing. Twenty men gathered in a village in the region of Barbonmadhubani, sitting under the tree and waiting for the "customer" to ask the price.

The 35 -year -old Nirbhay Chandra JHA is one of the 20 men. He came to Madubani from Big Salai more than 100 kilometers away to participate in this "blind date" event. He was wearing a pink shirt and black trousers and stood nervously in the corner, hoping to solve his "life events" on this day.

In our common blind date, uncle and aunts usually hold a piece of white paper in hand, listing real estate, property, etc. one by one. But this "blind date" activity in India is far more direct than this.

Neilbay opened the door to see the mountain -he only costs 50,000 rupees dowry.

Nelbay is a factory manager, with stable income and considers himself a good choice. He feels that 50,000 is not much. "If I am young, I can easily reach 200,000 to 300,000 rupees."

It is said that the amount of dowry has a lot to do with the groom's occupation. If the other party is an IAS (India's main civil servant system) official, the dowry amount is between 10 and 20 million rupees; if he does business in Dubai or has a good job, the amount can even be as high as 5 million to 100 million rupees.

Generally speaking, the male guardians who came to choose the groom, such as his father or brother. As long as they can take out enough dowry, they can "buy" the groom they like here.

But in this process, the bride who really wants to spend a lifetime with the man in front of him often has no say.

Of course, the man waiting for being purchased did not know what his fiancee looked like.

Improved momentum

The book "Surnames and Hindu Society" once pointed out that the dowry system has repeatedly banned, and it has a lot to do with the surname system.

India's surname system divides people into four levels: Brahmin, Kadley, Parcis and Shouhara. These four categories account for about 5%, 4%, 2%, and 45%of India's population. In addition to the four surnames, there is also a person who is excluded from the surname, namely "non -contact" or "pariah". This category accounts for about 18%of the population.

For more than three thousand years, the surname system has a great impact on people's daily life and customs. Although Congress passed a proposal to abolish the surname system in 1948, racial discrimination has not been completely eliminated.

According to a report from the Indian Express in February this year, data from the Indian Human Development Survey report showed that 95%of Indians are still looking for a partner in the second name under their surname.

For low -surnamed women, the only way to change position is to marry high surnames, and to achieve this, the woman can't avoid preparing a solid dowry.

However, some media pointed out that there have been some improvement in society.

For example, some "Dalit" (that is, the so -called "pariah") who have received high -quality education and finds decent work, in fact, it is not difficult to achieve a cross -surname marriage.

In addition, the Indian government is also promoting changes in the marriage system. In 2017, India relaxed the conditions for encouraging cross -surname marriage plans. As long as one party is "Dalit" and meets relevant conditions, the newlywed couple can obtain 250,000 rupees (about RMB 25,600).

However, what makes people even more hopeful is young people.

A report in 2021 analyzed the younger generation in 2007 and 2016, and found that their marriage concept has changed a lot in the past 10 years.

An obvious change is that the proportion of young people who marry early is declining. According to Lokniti-CSDS, the proportion of married youths in 2007 was 55%; by 2016, this proportion dropped to 47%. In addition, people's acceptance of singles is increasing. On the other hand, young people's acceptance of the marriage of cross -surnames also increased from 31%in 2007 to 56%in 2016.

In addition, the data of "Politics and Society Between Electy" in 2021 shows that most people support women's decision -making position in marriage -72%believe that women have the power to determine the time for marriage ; 74%believe that women have a say in marriage.

The surname system that has continued for thousands of years can naturally not be eliminated during the day and night. The phenomenon of "grabbing the groom" is not to stop. But no matter how "the road is long and far away", many people have taken a step in their minds.

Uncle Kuju

"Chinese Cat"

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